Positive Thinking Can't Hurt During An Ice Storm

Due to the ice storm that knocked power out all over the city, I haven't had much of a chance to work on this week's Monday Morning, so I decided to reprint one from October 19, 2005. I think it's message is just as timely "in times like these" as it was two years ago.

The other day a meeting planner told me “Thanks, but no thanks.”
We had been discussing the possibility of having me as a speaker for an upcoming convention and after reviewing my speech topics and themes, this late twenty-something told me, “I know you’re good—I’ve heard your tapes, but your message is stuck in the eighties. I mean these days, people are too sophisticated to go for all that positive thinking stuff, even if it isn’t Pollyannaish, which what you teach isn’t. Today’s generation wants to hear about reality—not what they can become.”

Well, I didn’t argue with her, I simply thanked her and hung up the telephone. I could have told her about the exciting research I shared with you back in November (of 2004). As you will recall all of these studies, conducted by renowned psychologist concluded that positive emotions such as joy and happiness arise from deliberate thoughts that are chosen by the individual.

For example, Neuro psychologist Richard Davidson at the University of Wisconsin found after further research that positive emotions provide the foundation needed to create the mental environment for emotional stability and better health in general. His work and that of several others in the field have shown that individuals who consistently choose a positive mindset are less likely to be stymied or become depressed in the face of negative influences.

As you will recall from that November Monday Morning, Martin Seligman, president of The American Psychological Association has written that “Literally hundreds of studies show that pessimists give up more easily and get depressed more often. These experiments also show that optimists do much better in school and college, at work and on the playing fields…their health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most of us from the usual physical ills of middle age. Evidence suggest they may even live longer.”

Recently, I found an article by Lee Jampolsky, Ph.D. on the American Management Association website (http://www.amanet.org) entitled Exceptional Thinking Makes Exceptional Employees: How to Encourage Positive Thinking to Increase Productivity. In the article he points out that “Often attitude is the element that separates the average employee from an exceptional one. Yet, in business today, most employers do not emphasize the need for a positive attitude, nor do they provide their employees with the appropriate training they need to understand the importance of a ‘can do’ attitude.”

So there you have it. Prominent psychologists and researchers have concluded that positive attitudes and positive thinking are the foundation for real happiness, emotional stability, better health and becoming an exceptional employee or business person.
In addition to these contemporary voices we could add such notables as Epictetus, who taught that “People are not disturbed by things, but by the view they take of them.” Then there was Ralph Waldo Emerson who reminded us that “A man is what he thinks about all day long” and who can ignore the late Dr. Karl A. Menninger, founder of the Menniger Clinic (which became the preeminent psychiatric and psychoanalytic center in the United States) who, after years of practicing psychiatry stated emphatically that “Attitudes are more important than facts.”
One of the keys to developing or maintaining a more positive attitude is to learn to balance your thinking. Real positive thinking doesn’t ignore the negative things in the world. Nor is it a form of denying the real problems and challenges we are facing. People with a real positive attitude acknowledge the problem but instead of fretting about it start focusing on solutions or potential opportunities growing out of the problem. Likewise, they don’t ignore crisis, rather they allow their minds to find creative (often out of the box) ways to resolve them. Such a person doesn’t allow one or two setbacks or situations to ruin their day, instead they take the attitude, “Other than this, it’s a good day.”

Balanced thinking is simply finding ways to mentally balance the negative with the positive. This balance is important because if we allow ourselves to dwell on the problems and negative things around us our minds lose their ability to think creatively and efficiently. So this week, practice keeping your thinking balanced by focusing toward solutions and away from the negative.
So this week, why not begin to improve your skills in maintaining (or start to develop) a positive attitude. Here’s some simple, yet effective ideas that you may find helpful.

1. Discipline yourself to make it a point to only speak in positive terms for 24 hours. This doesn’t mean that you have to agree with every hair-brained idea that is presented to you, it means you seek to help the person improve on their idea. For example, you might say “You know John, that’s an interesting concept that I’ll need to study for awhile, but let me ask if you’ve considered doing (whatever would take the “hair” out and help make it a “brainy” idea). Nor does it mean you have to avoid dealing with employees who aren’t doing their job if you supervise people, rather it means finding ways to frame constructive criticism positively. An example would be, “Freda, I want to discuss some things that I feel will be critical to your success with the company.” Naturally, speaking only in positive terms also refers to your social conversations with others, whether you are talking about work, family or coworkers.

2. Analyze your relationships to determine those individuals or groups that are positive and upbeat. It is a well known fact that we tend to absorb the attitudes of others. This doesn’t mean we should totally abandon those people we identify as being negative, but it means we cultivate and deepen relationships with our more positive friends and seek to spend most of our time with them.

3. Take time to make yourself aware of the goodness that surrounds you. This is one of the key cited by the researchers I mentioned in the opening part of this edition as being most important in developing positive attitudes. Taking time to be aware of the goodness around you means more than being awestruck by the wonders of nature. To be truly effective we must in the words of an old hymn, “count our many blessings, name them one by one.” When we consistently do this, we will be constantly amazed at the positive things we have going for us, even in the seeming worst of times.
Have a great and profitable week!
Robert Hidde
bob@confidentliving.com